From "TUK TUK" to "Take This"

TUK TUK, say these words in front of an audience representing different countries and you will be astonished by the upshot when asked. The Europeans will answer it as the TUK store with a good collection for Men, Women & Children for shoes. A Croatian citizen will say that there is a village named Tuk there. When asked by an African or a Kenyan he knows tuk-tuk as an auto rickshaw. There may be an acronym representing TUK somewhere as well. But, when you ask an Indian sub-continental person especially Pakistani guy, what TUK TUK means, you will be witnessing a broad grin on that person face and he would reply Misbah-ul-Haq the captain of Pakistan Cricket Team. Yeah, you got that right. Even Google proudly searches Misbah when queried for Tuk Tuk. Too much information for tuk tuk perhaps!

Tuk Tuk is perhaps the only term in Pakistan which went more viral than Tahir Shah’s Eye2Eye (if you have not listened to that legendary singer till yet, bro you lack observatory eyes and you have no right to live on this planet). Enough has been said and commented on the later; let us spotlight on Misbah oh my apologies Tuk Tuk. So, I was telling you that perhaps this phrase gained enough fame among youth to be designated as slang. I may not be able to change your perspective altogether but there are some stats and facts which you should keep in mind before affiliating Tuk Tuk to Misbah-ul-Haq.

The cricketing career of Misbah-ul-Haq has not been smooth. It has been a roller coaster ride. I still remember watching the game of Pakistan versus New Zealand where he made his first appearance in 2001 at Auckland. That was perhaps the golden era of Pakistan batting lineup where it had BIG-3 in its lineup to make every bowler sweat. Yes, I am talking about great Inzimam, Muhammad Yousuf (Youhana at that time) and Younus Khan who made an astonishing debut to international cricket. So, Misbah had to wait till age 27 to make an International debut. That too happened when Inzimam was not playing. When you live under the shadow of such greats, you are automatically a bit confused. That was apparent on Misbah as well. Technically very strong and was praised by foreign commentators back then for his resilience. However, he was soon out of scene because middle order was already congested with BIG-3. It was 2006 when we really started to see Misbah in Pakistan colors. He made an immediate impact in inaugural T20 World Cup where he almost single handedly won Cup for Pakistan (people remember only the last paddle sweep he miscued, they shall also what happened before that sweep and the looks on the face of Indian team and fans). It was a mere demonstration of Misbah caliber to play big shots whenever needed and required. See, he was not born as TUK TUK!

Pakistani batting was never a strong suite; although time to time some great batsmen appeared on canvas and became famous, BIG-3 were also regarded as such. Once, they went the weak batting lineup was there fragile enough to collapse under 100 many times. It badly felt the space left by cool calm Inzi, flamboyant Yousuf, and unconventional unorthodox Younis. Misbah had to fill the place of one on paper but had to do the job of all three. How well did he perform his job, well you have to be an unbiased cricketing fan to judge that. He is the leading run scorer for 2013 calendar year at the age of 39. Please note that all of those runs came away from home. You have to always keep that in mind while assessing Pakistani cricket team performance. How much home advantage matters? Ask India. Misbah stats will tell you another story, his track record will show another, and his impact on team will be something else. But, to be honest he did more than he was assigned for and yet I see the blame of all misdoings to Misbah. WHY?

It’s true that sometimes well infact almost every now and then Misbah finds himself in a situation where the team is either 15-3 or 20-4 or 5 down before 50 within powerplay. In such a scenario either you got to have a batting line up like india has, where it’s almost guaranteed that batsmen following me will do the damage control, repair work as well as shift gears when required OR you should have a long tail capable of holding one end with prime batsman. This is not happening for Pakistan, not for now, but for ages. So, the extra load and burden makes Misbah play unnatural block n block game rather playing freely. What you people see as TUK TUK, I call it consuming all the pressure so that others can breathe free. It’s the fault of other batsmen who change their own game style and blame it on captain slow approach afterwards. Your captain will play positive cricket if you provide him the platform to do so, otherwise you gonna see TUK TUK, and I don’t say its related to Misbah, anyone who will be replacing Misbah in future will be doing the same in this scenario. This is where and when people gonna miss Misbah and say

“yaar is say tau Misbah hi behtar tha, kam sy kam baad mai chakkay tau maar hi leta tha”

Just like we heard people saying

“ye kya bkwas batting lineup hai, is sy behtar tau inzimam tha, slow khelta tha pr match jitwata tha”

OR people who saw Imran Farhat/Nazir as opener saying

“Ye bhi koi opening pair hai, openers tau Aamir Suhail aur Saeed Anwar hotay thay, 3 overs mai 50”

Perhaps it was Misbah’s TUK TUK that cost 99’ world cup or an early exit in 03’ and 07’ editions. Perhaps he was the main reason to blame for spot fixing saga. Perhaps he was responsible for humiliating whitewash in Australia. Perhaps he was the main reason for internal rift in team. The peace process of Pakistan with India is going through TUK TUK phase perhaps so misbah is to blame. Perhaps American attack on Afghanistan was because of Misbah. Who knows, even Naga Saki atomic bomb blast was triggered by Misbah. Perhaps the word fault was designated to Misbah and Dunya mai jo kaam bhi ghalat aur slow ho raha hai us mai misbah ka hath hai..

So people please use the upper portion of your head IF there resides a brain, if you blame Misbah than you should not spare Hafeez (retard professor),  Afridi (I Miss U Hit), Kamran Akmal (once an Akmal, always a Fuckmal), Shaoib Malik (Laad ka laadu), Imran Farhat (mjhe kya prwa mere sussar gi hain na), Imran Nazir (1000 chance do, ik hi trha out ho kr dikhaoga) and Faisal Iqbal (maamo maamo mai ny 4 runs bna lye) by any means because this is the filth we need to take care of.

See you later guys, enough TUK TUK for the day, please ponder on it for some time, koi beTUKki baat ni ki main nay.